Tongue-tied

Tongue-tied

Ben fell in love with Julie
who worked in the coffee shop
so every day he'd go in for coffee
but he was always served by Dot

Then one day Julie served him
at last his time had come
but his knees got weak and wobbly
and he found that he was dumb

He couldn't think of what to say
no words came to his head
so he thought he'd order coffee
but this is all he said

'I'll have a cuf of coppee
I mean a cop of cuffee please
I mean a cof of cuppee
oh sod it, I'll have some tea'

Now I can relate to my friend Ben
because I have the same affliction
in the company of pretty girls
something goes wrong with my diction

Jacquie and Jill are beautiful twins
and I couldn't tell them apart
I've enough trouble talking to one pretty girl
when there's two I don't know where to start

I tried hard to think of something to say
when I did it all came out wrong
'how long have you two been twins then?' I asked
and one of them said 'not too long!'

Then they laughed to each other, they were laughing at me
so I had to say something clever
'so, which one of you is your sister?' I said
then I wished I'd not seen them, not ever

I don't suppose I'll see them again
my chance is positively blown
I'm famous for saying the stupidest things
my mouth has a mind of it's own